Friday, November 1, 2013

the World Series is over and I don't care

Disclaimer: If you really, really love baseball, take offense to lighthearted teasing, and/or don't like French toast... do not read on.

Disclaimer regarding the Previous Disclaimer: This post has absolutely nothing to do with French toast but not liking it would mean that you aren't human.  And I have a strict humans-only policy on my blog.  Yeah, but really.  It's even on a sign:


I've never been the girl who would rather watch E! than ESPN; I'd rather talk about goal-line play calling than Kim's child-birthing experience any day.  For the most part, I really like sports.

Except baseball. I just really don't get it.

I mean, I understand the rules of baseball.  I played softball throughout my awkward preteen years and for four years, I've been battling (and often losing to) the Yankees for Derrick's heart.  I understand what's going on... I just don't get it.  I know, I know... baseball is American and what am I?  A communist?  I probably don't like apple pie or Bill Cosby either, right?

I don't know... I just can't get into it.  Even during the World Series, the most important games of the season, I just sort of wanted to be cutting my toenails or cleaning the shower or pretty much doing anything besides watching the game.

And to sum it up, here's why:

1. It takes too long.  Some sports, like soccer, are sort of vague about the whole time frame thing... but at least they give us something to work with.  Baseball, on the other hand, is like being stuck in traffic when you really gotta pee: it just never seems to end.  There's too much of a good thing and then there's too much of something that sort of sucks to begin with.  And that's baseball.

2. They stand around too much.  You have football, where you can pretty much guarantee that 95% of the plays will involve someone's face getting smashed into the ground.  Then you have baseball, where the left fielder spends 95% of the sixth inning picking at a hangnail.

3. It makes SportsCenter Top 10 really lame.  I'll admit it: it's pretty cool when a guy sprints to the warning track and makes a last second diving catch.  But when the next eight guys do it, you sort of wish they'd just drop it once in a while.

4. The officials are way too sensitive.  I never really watched hockey before moving to Blackhawk Central, but it's kind of growing on me... especially the crazy violent and totally legal brawls.  And even though the NFL is getting sort of soft with its new "concussions aren't as cool as advertised" rules, you still get a few good hits in.  But baseball?  Someone gets a little mouthy and the umps are scandalized, throwing old guys out left and right.

5. Ray Lewis doesn't play baseball.  And there's just no redeeming that.

I read this list to Derrick and he wouldn't talk to me for half an hour.  And I know this is a lot coming from someone whose sport of choice is essentially running in circles.  I just can't get into it though... what can I say?

But I won't judge anyone who likes the classic American sport.  And hell, I'll even throw on my O's shirt a few times a summer because, if nothing else, baseball game peanuts are not a joke.

But if we're being totally honest: thank God that's over, because I just don't get it.

That's it.  But that's ok because you know what?

It's Friday, Friday
Gotta get down on Friday...
Partyin', partyin'
Fun, fun, fun, fun.

... and now we're really done.
Also, linking up with Sarah because she might be the only would who will appreciate this sports crap.

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1 comment:

  1. I used to be a baseball fanatic... I knew all their RBI's... that has been years. . Football I never understood:-(