Wednesday, December 4, 2013

I can do it like Martha (Stewart, that is)

As you may have gathered, I like tea. And I don’t discriminate; I like it all, from the grandmotherly English black tea to her slutty gas station niece, Arizona iced.

In the past, I preferred my tea neat (with a packet of Splenda) and rarely dabbled in any frilly mixed drinks. And then Chicago happened, where I was somehow sucked into a vortex of local cafe iced chai tea lattes. Honestly, I loved them.  They made me feel a pleasant combination of cultured, hipster, and British.

The only downside to being so trendy was that they cost more than $4 a piece.  Which doesn't sound so bad but if you multiply that by 8 (about the frequency at which I drank them per month), that’s $32.  That’s, like, five shirts at Target.  Or any of these things.  Suddenly, not so cool. 

So now that I've gone into way more detail than is acceptable about tea, to the point: I needed a solution to the problems that tea drinkers in Chicago evidently face.

I thought I had struck gold when I was flipping through the only magazine in the lunchroom, Martha Stewart’s Living, and found this gem for spice infused milk and chai tea lattes with said milk.

It sounds just so domestic and delightful, doesn't it?  Except what the eff are “star anise”?  Are they like mini ninja stars?  I've never seen these at Walmart.

Based on that and also because I’m way too impatient to wait an hour for milk to steep, I practiced a bit of college-student-broke-ingenuity and came up with my own recipe:

Ingredients: Tazo chai tea // Blue Diamond Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Milk //
Splenda (or Walmart knock-off)

I've been drinking this a lot lately; Derrick and I have developed a new routine where, after my morning workout and before work, we sit around and chat for half an hour over our tea.  (Yes, somehow Derrick and I managed to skip middle age all together and jumped directly into geriatrics.)

In my humble opinion, they’re the bomb.  And if you don’t believe me, just read the raving reviews they've gotten:

Derrick enjoys a slightly different version, however; he uses real sugar instead of Splenda.  I know that a lot of people might disprove of cancer bomb artificial sweeteners, but I average four cups of tea a day and I disapprove of big butts more.

And there you have it, the reason why I'm not a food blogger.

Happy Hump Day!  Wishing you good tea with even better company.

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