Thursday, February 13, 2014

Five Things You Need to Consider Before You Move In Together


Remember that time I forced my opinion on cohabitation down my unsuspecting readers' throats?

Well, I make no apologies.  I do, however, feel like I should add a caveat to that post.  That caveat being: even though I think living together before marriage is the way to go, I don't think you need to jump right in without some thought.

It's like when my dad threw my aunt's Pomeranian into the deep end of the pool one afternoon: just because it's a dog doesn't necessarily mean it can swim.  Similarly, just because you've been dating your soul mate for three whole weeks doesn't necessarily mean that you're ready for the deep end of cohabitation.

Now, I'm not saying that there is a specific timeline for when you're ready to throw your metaphorical Pomeranian in head-first, but I am saying that there are a few things you need to consider before you do.  Because if not, the next thing you might be throwing is a toaster at your now ex-boyfriend's head.


As a twenty-something living with her boyfriend in a small studio in the city, I've been around the cohabitation block.  So before you move in together, here are a few things I think you need to consider.


And if not, is one of you willing to watch SNL in the bathroom? If your relationship has a Nicole-type, who just can't fall asleep with the TV on, then it better either have someone who can give up late night television or is the Derrick-type, who loves the Nicoles in the world enough to watch Saturday Night Live on a Kindle by the light of the bathroom.


I'm not saying that when you move in together, it's on with the hair highlighting cap and the end of shaving.  But eventually, you're going to have a pimple that you just need to take care of.  And if he hasn't seen you without an hour of cheekbone contouring yet, then it might be too soon to jump straight into pimple cream zone.


If so, I heavily recommend that you set down some clear guidelines regarding when and who restocks the fridge. It's an important talk that every serious couple should be having.


After Derrick and I started dating as college sophomores, I spent that first year of our relationship half-pretending that girls never poop.  And by "half-pretending," I mean that I spent the first year of our relationship using public restrooms a lot more than was necessary.  Apart from making it Derrick's dearest ambition to catch me in the act (messed up, I know), it's also a really hard lie to keep up once you're living in the same 500 sq. foot room.  So my suggestion is to just admit the truth now: everybody poops.


If so, say hey to Glinda the Good Witch and Professor Sprout for me, because you're all living in worlds that don't exist.
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I'm not saying that these five considerations are your ticket to happily ever after but let's put it this way: neither of us have thrown a toaster yet.

Happy Friday Eve!
Tell me: Anything you'd add to this list?

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1 comment:

  1. I agree you should totally move in before marriage. My husband and I moved in with each other a month before getting married (we wanted to mooch off our parents for as long as possible) I wish we would have sooner to get all the kinks out of the way. The first couple of years was rough... luckily we made it through! I still act like girl's don't poop... we've been married almost seven years... lol

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